Milo is such a lucky boy. He is so loved by so many. He is also lucky because he has two wonderful Grandmothers and a Grandfather that basically worship the ground he spills his milk and crunches goldfish crackers on. He sees at least one of his grandparents weekly. Sometimes he sees all of them, multiple times in a week.

I always had a wonderful relationship with my grandparents. And if you’ve been reading here awhile you know I had a special bond with my grandma, Mariam. So, the fact that he gets to spend so much time with his family and grandparents makes me so happy. I’m grateful that my Mother was finally able to move back to California last year so she can be here for Milo. We’ll never let her leave again!

Grandparents can be a wonderful thing, I miss mine daily and am so sad often that none of them ever got to meet Milo and see this truly amazing human I created.

Oh hey, I DO still have a blog. Weird. It totally did not take me 5 minutes to figure out how to log in or anything.

In case you haven’t noticed, this blog is like the very last thing ever on an ever growing list of priorities.  And also, Privacy is a major concern to me lately. I used to have zero worries about exploiting myself and family here. Now, I like my privacy. I like the world not knowing every single worry & issue I’m having.

But, I do figure I owe a tiny explanation to my super small list of readers…

I have been having health issues that have made me extremely fatigued. So when I do have energy in the day I’m TCB! Laundry, errands, cooking, grocery shopping, playing with Milo.  But at the end of the day I’m exhausted. I climb into bed every night within 20 minutes of putting Milo to bed.  Some days I go to bed feeling like “Super Mom”, some days I go to bed with a heavy feeling of  guilt. That day I was too tired to be the Mom I wanted to be. Or take out Mom & insert Wife, Friend, Sister, Daughter, house keeper, chef, etc……. It varies day to day.

I have hope that it will get better. I’m under a Doctors care & am getting constant testing & weekly b12 shots right now. I’ve been diagnosed with Pernicious Anemia. I initially thought it was due to my go at vegetarianism but with further testing found out that this is a completely different type of anemia & has nothing to do with that. Which bummed me out. That would have been an easier fix. This doesn’t seem like it has a “fix”. I’ll most likely be supplementing with b12 for the rest of my life. Or as long as I want to feel good! Next up is having a GI specialist do a “scope” & stomach biopsy on me to check out whats going on in the ol’ tum tum. Exciting, right?!

I’m doing my best to adjust & stay on top of life. As usual our weekends are busy as can be. And I’m also some how trying to find the time/energy to “train” for a little 5k I’m doing on Thanksgiving morning aka My birthday!

Not looking for any sort of sympathy out of this post. Just simply updating as to whats going on & why the blog is slowing down.

By now I’m sure if you know who Steve Jobs is (get real, who doesn’t?!) then you know he’s passed away.  I’m surprised at how much sadness is looming over my Husband and I with hearing that news.

We have always appreciated cutting edge technology. Maybe because technology being part of our every day lives is how we’ve grown up. But, we appreciate it.

I never knew how much I needed an iPod until I randomly got one 7 years ago for Christmas. I got choked up when I opened it. I remember going to the bathroom almost immediately after I opened it in my (then boyfriend’s, now husband’s) parent’s living room. I didn’t want them to see that side of me….yet. But I was so overjoyed. I couldn’t believe I had this awesome thing in MY POSSESSION. It was mine. Mercer helped me figure it out & got every single song I loved loaded on to it. I fell asleep at night listening to Atmosphere & No Doubt, almost nightly. I remember distinctly walking into the gym with my iPod attached to my arm feeling like I was the SHIT! You had a cd player- You LAME!

When my Husband got his first iPhone he was obsessed. Again, I had a Blackberry & was perfectly content with it, I didn’t need an iPhone I said repeatedly to my Husband who tried often to convert me. Until the opportunity for a free iPhone presented itself. For someone who didn’t “need” it I sure did jump on that opportunity faster than my dog scarfs down a piece of fallen food to the kitchen floor. I was instantly enamored & couldn’t believe how much easier my iPhone made my life, & still continues to do so to this day. You should see the panic that takes over me when I can’t find my phone. I know that makes me sound kinda lame, I don’t care though. That piece of Apple helps me out through each day. It stores videos & pictures of my sweet family & friends, it helps me connect with my friends, family, & Internet friends daily, helps me find recipes for dinner, I can read a book on it while relaxing, check my favorite blogs, etc.  I try often to get friends to convert to an iPhone. You just don’t get it til you have one. 

We just really appreciate what this guy’s creativity has done for the world. So you don’t own an Apple product? Chances are you depend on a computer though. Your computer is as great as it is because whomever made it is trying to keep up with what Apple has already done. All these smart phones & their “app stores”. Your app store will never be the Apple App Store. It just won’t. I have no doubt that Apple will continue to create cutting edge, irreplaceable products. They seem to have the formula down now. I just think what could have been with the continued creativity that Jobs compelled. 56 is far too early to go.

He had a vision. He never strayed from it. That’s something to be admired. I admire what he’s done for the world & I admire his amazing outlook on life.

I did a lot of quiet thinking last night. About life, death, & all the in between. I try to live each day as happily as I can, I try not to dwell on things.  I try not to let others opinion sway the person I AM. But, I’d be lying if I said it sometimes doesn’t go that way. Some days I do dwell on things. Some days I do let people get me down. But yesterday was a reminder to do what I can to not let that happen too often. To not let someone’s opinion of me sway the person that I want to be, the things I want to achieve. Awesome isn’t created by laying in bed all day being mad at the world. Awesome isn’t created by letting other peoples doubts of you stand in the way of your visions. I think we all have the power to do amazing things.

Thank You Steve, For all that you’ve done, & the way you’ve touched so many lives.

Image Via: www.apple.com

Best Friends Forever. I know what that is. Literally.

Out of my almost 27 years of existence I’ve been friends with Ryan for almost 25 of them. Crazy right?!

I think so. 

I don’t see him enough. We all are busy. Not a good excuse, we need to hang out more. I miss him. Sometimes I don’t realize how much I miss him until I’m in his severely goofy, overly chatty presence. You see, he never stops talking. But I love that about him.

We grew up on the same street, My first memories ever are with him. He made me do boy stuff all the time growing up, but he was a good sport and sometimes would even play barbies or dress up with me too.  We were fixtures of each other’s homes & lives.  Also? My Brother and his Sister were high school sweet hearts & married 16(i think?) years ago. We were even in their wedding together.

We are family. Which is awesome. Our families are literally one now, and have been for some time. We often intermingle on Holidays & Birthdays & it’s always so comfortable. I think of his family as my own. I really do. I think of him as my third Brother, & his sister? Well she’s my sister too.

He got married yesterday to a wonderful lady named Danielle. Ryan also became an official second Dad yesterday to her three boys that he loves insane amounts.  Out of everyone I know Ryan is the most stand up guy (besides my brother). He’s a “good guy” in every sense of it.  Nice guys finish last is often true, & has sadly been true for him a few times.  Not this time though. He was so happy yesterday dancing at his reception with his Wife. It made me really happy.   I was really quiet yesterday. It’s because I was kinda emotional & feared that if I spoke too much I’d burst into tears in front of everyone.

His Step-Mom was toasting him & his wife at the reception & she was saying that she entered Ryan’s life 19 years ago. I zoned out on everything else she said after that. I was fixated on that number….19. I couldn’t believe that it had been 19 years.  That seems so long ago. But, I remember clearly when she and her 2 daughters came into their lives. (also, those 2 girls are part of my life too. I love them so much. Again, we’re like a big huge family) I just sat their & looked around at everyone, I knew so many of them & felt so comfortable there with everyone. I reminisced with Ryan’s Grandma, Connie about a few funny stories from our childhood & realized that this just isn’t the norm. We are really lucky. I am really lucky that I have this huge, wonderful extended family. That I’ve had it for a really long time & will always have this great connection with a group of people that aren’t “blood” related. That when they ask how my own little family is they aren’t just making small talk, that they genuinely care.  I felt very grateful on our long drive home last night.

I’m happy I got to spend time with everyone yesterday & celebrate a happy, happy day for Ryan and Danielle.

xoxox

and this is completely random but I will always think of Ryan when I hear this ridiculous song. We were super young, spending the weekend at My Brother’s & his Sister’s duplex back in the day & we tried our hardest to choreograph a dance to this song!