A few weeks ago Mercer (after a lot of convincing) and I decided that we were going to take a vacation at the end of the year. We’ve never been on a real vacation together, and I’ve never been on one, period. Well out of the country at least. So this is a birthday trip for me -slash- little honeymoon, since we never took one after getting married. While I’m seriously excited, I also have terrible anxiety over it.

We decided on Puerto Rico. It was between there and Mexico. The drug ring/war stuff going on down there scared us so we decided not to go there like we were originally planning. Bonuses of going to Puerto Rico are: No passports required, and they are very US friendly, and uses US currency.

Now here is where my multi-faceted anxiety comes in:

• Where to stay? Do we want to stay in the main tourist area, San Juan, or do we want to venture down somewhere else like, Fajardo. We do not want to rent a car while there and heard it’s a good idea to do if you stay in Fajardo.  But, we aren’t looking to do much while there, eat, drink, beach, repeat.  The main reason I want to stay down there is because I’d like to take a day trip to Flemenco Beach. It’s supposed to be one of the best beaches in the world according to the Discovery Channel.  If we stayed in San Juan we most likely would never see Flemenco Beach and would probably end up spending less money.
• Next major anxiety?  Leaving My child for 5 days.  This is killing me. To the point where I keep contemplating the trip all together. My fears are insane. I’m insane. I fear things like an Tsunami will hit, kill us, MJ has no parents now.  Or I fear that something will happen to him and I won’t be able to get an immediate flight out of PR to get back to the states.  Last fear, that he will think we’ve abandoned him.  =(
• Then I have the added little things like finding a house sitter and some one to take care of the dog for 5 days.

So, I have a lot to figure out and get over. I’m determined not to let my anxiety win. We deserve a vacation, baby free.  We will see how it goes.  I just need to book our airfare ASAP then I will GO. I’ll have to go.

Really, How can I let myself miss out on this beach?

One of the wonderful things about living where we do is that the Beautiful, Lake Tahoe, is just a little under two hours away from us.  One of my ‘Summer Goals’ was to take MJ there for his first time.  So Friday my Hubs took the day off work (which I’m still trying to figure out HOW that even happened. The guy NEVER takes a day off work. Read the rest of this entry…

November 24th is my 25th Birthday. My Husband is taking me to Los Angeles to celebrate. We are going to The Hello Kitty 35th Anniversary exhibit called Three Apples. I’m a MAJOR Hello Kitty fan, so obviously I’m super excited about this trip.  Now enter dilemma:

To take Milo or leave him at home with family for the weekend. We’ve had several offers from family to take care of him for the weekend. At first it wasn’t even a question. We’d obviously be taking him with us for the weekend. But, the more I’ve been thinking about and talking to Mercer about it all I just don’t know. . . The drive for one concerns me. It’s usually around 6 hours. Milo really needs entertainment now and I honestly don’t know how he will do on  a 6 hour car ride there and back all in a weekend. Also, Mercer and I could desperately use some time alone together. We didn’t even celebrate our anniversary this year because we were so busy. It would be nice to have a weekend alone with him, and he was actually the one to bring that up.

Here’s my issue with leaving him for the weekend. I’m with him ALL of the time. Milo doesn’t go to daycare or anything like that and we rarely go out and leave him with anyone. We seriously take him everywhere with us. He’s so used to me, and I really regret that I haven’t left him more often with family so he gets used to them more. I’m scared that A.) he will think that I have abandoned him and be heartbroken and B.) Just be so absolutely upset all weekend and cry and be really unmanageable for whoever takes care of him. C.) Something happens to him and he has to go to the hospital and I’m stuck 6 hours away and there are no immediate flights from LAX to SMF. I tend to over analyze everything. D.) And finally I’m scared that I will miss him a ridiculous amount resulting in me having a shitty time on our vacation.

I really don’t know what to do.

Any suggestions and opinions are welcomed!

The travel bug has bitten me. 2010 I really want to be a year of travel for me. I need to get over my fear of flying and go enjoy other parts of the world. I’ve decided to do this even if Mercer doesn’t want to go with me. I’ll take Milo and expose him to the world!

Some places I’d like to visit next year are:

Bellingham, WA to visit my mother and while we are there I’d like to take day trips to Vancouver, CA and Seattle also.

New York! We seriously need to go visit James (my husbands Best Bud) and experience the Big Apple! (I’m pretty sure I can talk Mercer into this one, cause we’d be seeing James!)

Mexico, or somewhere warm and with a great beach. Possibly Miami. I’d really like to go to Turks & Caicos but that might be a bit too expensive. I won’t travel out of the country by myself with Milo though. So Mercer or a friend or even my Mom will have to join me on that trip.

I just feel sometimes like while I was blissfully living my life at home, working and being all in love and stuff I didnt get to explore the world as much as some of my friends have. And I really want to. I want to visit new places, and see new things. And really want to try and take Milo on one trip a year, to let him know there is more out there to life than just where we live and he can go anywhere in the world he’d like.